Topic: The Cure

[Scyphi]

*Meanwhile, still wandering around in an unknown prison facility...*

[Gee, this is sure is taking a lot longer than I thought it would.--Scyphi]

[Yeah, it's been...what...an hour since we got out of that cell and started wandering around?--StupidScyphi]

[I, uh, think it's been a bit longer than that, StupidScyphi.--Scyphi]

[Oh. I think I'm missing that show I wanted to see, then...--StupidScyphi]

[Sorry, but this prison is just crawling with traps waiting for us to trigger, so we gotta proceed carefully.--SmartScyphi]

[Otherwise, we stumble into some rather painful traps. Like that pit of porcupines we fell into. Ooh, that was not fun. I'm still picking quills out of my...--EvilScyphi]

[Too much information!--Scyphi]

[Oh, it's not that bad, is it? We've only triggered exactly 500 traps during our wanderings and we're still alive, aren't we? And didn't we have some fun, though? *nudges Scyphi* Remember when you were sliding into the fire pit and I said "Goodbye," and you were like, "NO WAY," and then I was all...--RandomScyphi]

[Would you stop it with the Portal quotes already? You could send StupidScyphi into another panic attack. You KNOW that game scares the living daylights out of him.--SmartScyphi]

[Particularly "she-who-must-not-be-named."--EvilScyphi]

[*innocently* Who? GLaDOS?--RandomScyphi]

[*freezes* EEP! The crazy computer lady! AHHHHH! *goes into a panic attack*--StupidScyphi]

[*sighs* Don't worry, I've got another tranquilizer dart here.--EvilScyphi]

*Loads dart into Ol' Bessy and shoots it at StupidScyphi*

*StupidScyphi freezes for a moment, then falls over and promptly starts snoring, in a deep sleep*

[*picks up StupidScyphi to carry* Can't believe I'm doing this again...*at RandomScyphi*...You know you owe me big for doing all of this, right? I HATE helping people. So you had better pay me back GOOD for all of this...icky...good...stuff I've been forced to do.--EvilScyphi]

[And if you don't want to owe him anything more, you had better stop quoting Portal.--Scyphi]

[But-but-but...now what will I quote?--RandomScyphi]

[Well this IS a Descent-related forum, isn't it? So do some Descent quotes!--Scyphi]

[*thinks for a moment* I can't think of anything to quote that makes fun of our present situation.--RandomScyphi]

[Well, keep thinking until you do. Maybe that'll keep you quiet for awhile.--EvilScyphi]

[I heard that!--RandomScyphi]

[Hey! I think I've found it! I think the cure is behind this door!--SmartScyphi]

[Really? How can you be sure?--Scyphi]

[The "MPD Cure safe-keeping and storage room, anyone with the name 'Scyphi' is not permitted to proceed beyond this point" sign might have clued me in.--SmartScyphi]

[Well great! Let's get in there, grab the cure, keep it away from Scyphi, and get out of here!--EvilScyphi]

[*tries knob* The door's locked.--SmartScyphi]

[Can't you pick the lock?--Scyphi]

[It's electronic. You don't pick electronic locks, you hack into them, and I don't have my laptop with me.--SmartScyphi]

[*thinks for a moment* Well, I guess we're just we're just going to have to use our heads and come up with a solution.--EvilScyphi]

[*glances at StupidScyphi in EvilScyphi's arms* Hmm...use our heads...--RandomScyphi]

*a short while later*

[*slowly waking up and notices everyone is holding him up and flat on his back* Hi guys, what are you doing?--StupidScyphi]

[Using your head--RandomScyphi]

*all start running towards door, intending to use StupidScyphi as a battering ram*

[*noticing* But I don't want to use my head!--StupidScyphi]

*thud*

[Ow!--StupidScyphi]

[Again!--RandomScyphi]

*thud*

[OW!--StupidScyphi]

[Again!--RandomScyphi]

*thud*

*crack*

*crash*

[OWWWWowwwOWWW!--StupidScyphi]

[We're thorough!--RandomScyphi]

[And look! There's the cure! It's over there on that little platform!--Scyphi]

[Which, I note, happens to be surrounded by a mote of molten rock.--SmartScyphi]

[And the only way to get to it is by that narrow, rickety, and probably booby-trapped bridge.--EvilScyphi]

*look at each other for a long moment*

[So...who's going to go get the cure?--Scyphi]

[Maybe we should flip for it.--RandomScyphi]

[Nah, we just need someone...stupid enough...to go.--EvilScyphi]

*all look at StupidScyphi*

[Oh! You mean me?--StupidScyphi]

[You're stupid, right?--RandomScyphi]

[Ooh! Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm very stupid!--StupidScyphi]

[I don't know...you sure you're stupid enough?--EvilScyphi]

[What are we talking about again?--StupidScyphi]

[Good enough. Go and fetch the MPD cure, StupidScyphi!--RandomScyphi]

[Yay!--StupidScyphi]

*runs out onto the bridge, and gets most of the way across it before it's bolts suddenly snap and it falls into the pit of lava. With a yelp, StupidScyphi jumps the rest of the way and manages to grab the ledge of the platform the cure was on. Pulling himself up onto the platform, he grabs the cure and waves it in the air in victory at the others*

[Well great. He's got the cure. But now he's trapped over there with the bridge collapsed.--Scyphi]

['Ohh, you came so close, didn't you?' *chuckles* 'Poor Material Defender!' *nudges Scyphi with a grin* There, I did a Descent quote!--RandomScyphi]

[Doesn't help us figure out how we're going to get StupidScyphi back over here so we can get out of here.--EvilScyphi]

[*notices something* And it gets worse. Look, there's a security camera. *points at the wall behind StupidScyphi* The bad guys can probably see everything we're doing in here. We stay here for too long, and they're going to catch us again.--SmartScyphi]

[A security camera? That's it! Hey StupidScyphi! GLaDOS is watching you!--RandomScyphi]

[Huh? *turns around and sees the camera* EEP! The crazy computer lady! AHHHHHHHH! *goes into a panic attack and runs off the platform and into the lava moat* AH! HOT, HOT, HOT, HOT, HOT! *Runs quickly through the moat to the other side and climbs to safety. EvilScyphi grabs a fire extinguisher and uses it on StupidScyphi's feet* Ahhhhhh, that's better!--StupidScyphi]

[*grabs cure from him* Ah ha! I've got the cure yet again! MWAHAHAHA!--Scyphi]

[Oh no you don't! *snatches vile from Scyphi* We can't trust you to hold that.--SmartScyphi]

[Awww! --Scyphi]

[Hey! That's my bit!--StupidScyphi]

[Look, we got the cure! Can we go now?--EvilScyphi]

[We'd better, we're probably going to have a bunch of bad guys chasing us real soon if we don't.--SmartScyphi]

*They hurry for the exit at ludicrous speeds*

[Kaiaatzl]

The fivesome, minus Otterhawk, wake up in a strange place...

[Xaph]Where are we?

[FoxCannon]Looks like some kind of prison cell.

[FerretFire]*wakes up*Ooooooh, migraine.

[The N.I.P]Well, snap out of it, we need to get out of here.

[FerretFire]What's with the thumping?... sounds like there are a bunch of Random, Stupid, and Evil people stomping around on the next post up.

[FoxCannon]Yeah it does... they must be looking for something.

[Xaph]Would that something be us by any chance?

[FoxCannon]I doubt it, I heard them say something about a vial.

[Xaph]I didn't hear any talking...?

[FoxCannon]Foxes have better ears.

[FerretFire]I'm glad I'm not a fox then...

[The N.I.P]If you have a migrane you probably shouldn't talk.

[FerretFire]Sure...

[The N.I.P]You guys have any idea how we got here?

[FoxCannon]No, last thing I remember we were on a prairie and had just heard about some kind of cure and it upset Xaph because he had just made a time machine...

[Xaph]...uhh... Moving on, maybe we can signal to the people above us somehow?...

[FoxCannon]How would you suggest doing that?

[Xaph]I dunno, you and The N.I.P are the brains here when it comes to practical matters.  I'm just the gadget inventor.

[The N.I.P]Hmm...

to be bafflingly continued...

[SaladBadger]

[InsanityTech: locking on.... Found it! They've escaped and have the vial!]

[InsanityBrains: Ok, cool. Now they just need to not murder themselves over the vial]

*The two are suddenly inturrupted by a dragon roaring, a few explosions, a couple of crashing waves, and what sounds like a baby crying and screaming*

[InsanityTech: ... What the crap was that!?]

[InsanityBrains: Dare I ask....]

*KillerInsanity walks in, looking tired and somewhat beat*

[InsanityKiller: Emergency! That green-clothed girl and miner are currently sending all sorts of beasts after each other in some form of duel]

[Alieo]

[Alieo] DAH! What happened to this guys? This was very good! Then it just ends???

[Alieus] I suppose so. And it ended on "Black Friday" of all days

[Alieo] Pah! Imagine that... hey, that was our birthday wasn't it?

[Alieus] Yup! We sure got old.

[Alieo] Tell me about it. 10 years is a long time.

[Alieus] Wait, I'm 8.

[Alieo] That's right. You were created two years after I was.

[Alieus] Yep. But, by who?

[Alieo] Who do you think? None other than N...

*LOUD THUNDERING FROM ABOVE FOLLOWED BY ECHOEY VOICE* SILENCE!!!

[Alieo & Alieus]  Wh-wh-who's THAT?

[ME] ME! THE NAME IS NOT IMPORTANT ON THE FORUMS!

[Alieo] OH! Right... gotcha. Sorry about that.

[ME] REVEAL ME and YOU WILL SUFFER MY WRATH[/color]

[Alieus] *gulp* O-o-o-o-kay buddy! We're cool! Just don't kill us off again!

[Alieo] That's right! I may be 10 but you DID sip that vial ONCE back in 2003 on your 19th birthday. Both Alieus and I died and I haven't seen the artificial light of day in the forums or piloted a Pyro-GX in over 8 years! Then a few days ago you bring us back? What gives?

[Alieus] YEAH! Do you know what it's like to be cryogenized for 8 years? IT'S BORING!!!

[ME] SILENCE!!! I DO KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE LOCKED UP IN A CRYOGENIZED STATE! I'M IN ONE NOW![/color]

[Alieo] Oh? HOW SO?

[ME] WELL... *voice gets less echoey and more normalized* let me explain. In a nutshell, I've been busy! I went back to school in 2004-2005 to get my basics out of the way to get accepted into mortuary school. Then, in 2007-2008, I worked in the funeral business but got quickly burned out from being woken up in the middle of the night to pick bodies up. So, I went back to school in 2010 and am now working to become a mechanical engineer. This is where my "cryogenic stasis" begins. I'm trapped at home for now due to budget restraints and need a little something to pass the time. So, I resurrected you two. Truthfully, I've missed you all so very much. It has been a long time, and I promise to keep you guys more active!

[Alieo] Oh, I've been active alright. Hmm... so you actually made it into the funeral business. Hey! Do you still have that hearse you used to drive? That's the last car you had in 2003 before we were "quarantined" in your brain.

[ME] No... Mortimer did not live past the end of April of 04, but in the Summer of '09, I purchased Mortimer II!

[Alieus] Nice! yeah, I remember Mortimer. But I'll have to meet Mortimer II. What year is he?

[Mortimer II] I'm a white 1990 Cadillac S&S. Nice to meet the personalities finally! So which one of y'all comes out in the middle of rush hour traffic? Huh?

*silence*

[ME] Yeeeeeah... that's all me.

[Mortimer II] GAH!! I knew it! *tsk tsk tsk tsk* I knew that was you blasting Techno Industry from Descent in the rush hour traffic! Cool tune by the way.

[ME] Why thank you!

[Alieus] Hey Mortimer, do you have any ghosts? Are you haunted? You know, being a hearse & all?

[Mortimer II] *looking at Alieus impatiently*

*silence*

*THUD*

[Alieus] WHAT WAS THAT???

[ME] That was the Ghost of Mortimer II. Every now and then, a strange unexplicable THUD is emitted from the casket chamber of the car. Sounds like a hand slapping metal. A ouija board has confirmed that the "Ghost of Mortimer II" is the restless ghost of an airline captain.

*THUD*

[Alieus & Alieo]  OOOOOHHH!!!

[ME] There he goes again!

[The Ghost of Mortimer II] You guys need to keep it down! I'm trying to sleep! You all should too!

*Everyone suddenly gets very sleepy*

[Alieo] Why is this happening? Wait! I get it! Mortimer II and his "ghost" are all parts of your personality!

[ME] Nope... not so!

[Mortimer II] Yeah... have you guys looked at the time? IT'S FOUR AM! Look! right there on my CD deck!

[ME] Well THAT explains it!

*All yawning simultaneously*

[Alieo] So, now what?

[ME] NOW, we sleep! But later, mark my words, we will get the Scyphi vial.

[NUMBERZero]

I want to continue this, but I've been busy and this is at the bottom of my priority list.

3 day weekend coming up. Might do it on sunday.

[Kaiaatzl]

[FoxCannon]I can hear someone two posts above us.  It seems he's searching for the vial too.  Strangely his other personalities are doing nothing to stop him.  I sense something sinister going on.

[Ferretfire]Do you think this cure could destroy us?

[The N.I.P]I don't know, but I don't want to find out.

[FoxCannon]Yeah, we should get it and keep it safe and away from anyone, just in case.

[Ferretfire]My migraine is gone.

[The N.I.P]Good, then let's go.

[Xaph]Hey, wait up!

[FoxCannon]What is it now?

[Xaph]We should have a better plan before we go charging in there.  We're probably much weaker than they are, judging from what I can infer from the guy's voices.  I'd estimate our chances of survival to be about only one in ten if we don't know what we're doing.

[The N.I.P]Much as I hate to admit it, you have a point...

[Ferretfire]*drawn out sigh* But we still need to get to the vial before he does.  I don't think we have much time.  Besides I want to actually do something.

[The N.I.P]Well then let's make the plan as we find a way through this maze.  Come on.  And Xaph, I think we'll need some gadgets.

[Xaph]Roger that!

To be intriguingly continued...